People come to us all the time feeling guilty about their needs in the bedroom. Instead of being really clear about what they want and seeing whether their partner is up for it or not, they don’t ask at all or only ask for a small percentage of what they need, feeling that everything in the bedroom needs to be tit for tat.

We are hoping twenty-somethings haven’t faced the same kind of sexual double standards (which harm both men’s and women’s sexual self-expression) that most of us faced growing up and that they have a chance to explore more openly with less guilt and shame.

These days, finding balance between work and partnership is the tip of the iceberg, there are also friends, family (kids if you have them), personal errand and responsibilities, etc. Being over-busy is the scourge of our time, and relationships, and especially relaxed, spacious time to savor intimacy, connection and sex seems to be the biggest loser across the board.

We saw this Elle article on sexless marriage and thought you might be interested. Plus, we wanted to put in our two…