Our second of three posts outlining common issues that women face in dating and the top three mistakes we may make when facing these issues. Day 2 has to do with how we communicate:
Mistake #2 – From No Communication to Unkind Communication
The idea that Mr. Right will just know what you want without you having to ask, causes women who are dating to wait patiently and hope that he will be the man you want him to be — without you having to say anything.
This generally means that women in long term relationships have been holding their tongue and waiting for so long, when the frustration of not getting what they want finally comes out it comes out in blaming, shaming or accusatory ways, making the men in their lives feel useless and hopeless about pleasing them. The focus moves from bolstering a man’s ego and never telling him when you need something different to tearing him down and making him feel horrible.
Communicating your needs and boundaries does not need to be harsh – in fact, you can be clear about your boundaries and needs in a clear, loving, and connected way. When you realize it is impossible for anyone to read your mind or any one person to meet all of your needs, you can begin learning how to ask for, receive and delight in the gifts your partner actually has to offer.