Has your partner ever hinted at, suggested or asked for something sexual that seemed scarier than Camping at Crystal Lake with Jason? If so, we suggest you get into the Halloween spirit and consider that something new could turn out to be a Thriller instead of a Horror Flick. You might start by at least celebrating your partner’s desire the way you celebrate the joys of Halloween – it might seem dark and scary but, if you dress it up a little and put some candy on top, it’s a blast. Maybe you have some fear or uncertainty and taking a look at will help you stretch and grow as a person and as a lover. When it comes to venturing beyond your comfort zone, don’t bite off more than you can chew. Start with a Bit-O-Honey before moving on to a Big Hunk. Here’s some common Fright Night desires and how you can take it slow.
1) Going Down – whether it is on a man or a woman, if this is something that gives you the Heebie Jeebies, do it right out of the shower and try starting with some kisses or taking a lick, you may be surprised at how sweet a response you get and what fun it can be.
2) The Back Door – maybe you love the sensation but are afraid to ask because you don’t want to offend or maybe just the thought of it has you shaking in your boots. Even more than going down, this one requires a shower first. You might tiptoe out of your comfort zone with a lubed-up finger tip – lightly teasing externally only. Just see how that goes, no matter what, with the back door the only road to success is to take it slow and have lots of warm up!
3) Threesomes – many people have some version of this fantasy and we’ve seen the most success when couples don’t take an all-or-nothing approach. You can start by fantasizing about it together in bed and just see if the imagery ignites panic or passion. Make sure you talk through desires, fears and boundaries and, if you do venture into the Threesome Zone, a light make-out might just be the trick that results in the biggest treat!
If you would like to move beyond your comfort zones together as a couple but need some help with the negotiation, email or call – we’re here to help you turn trepidation into satiation!