
Relationship Repair – Step #4
Empathize: Be Your Sweetie’s Best Friend.
We once worked with a very creative couple. Once a week, they would sit down and “gossip” about their significant others, while pretending they were the best friend. This was a great way to hear about their partner’s difficulty with something they had done without going into fix-it mode or immediately or defending their actions. He would say, “I heard your boyfriend was a big jerk this week, tell me all about it.” When she got done venting, she would say, “yeah, I know your girlfriend can be a big pain in the ass, too, what was her deal this week?” In these conversations they made space for each others disappointments, frustrations, and emotions.