Celeste & Danielle Offer Sex and Relationship Coaching for a Passionate, Connected and Fulfilling Life

It’s vacation time again and you may be feeling the desire for a vacation or a staycation, where you can relax and enjoy your home and let the vacation come to you. Either way, we would like to offer you a couple’s retreat full of playfulness, passion and connection. Many couples take vacations hoping to spice up their sex life, and they often end up having a week or so of heightened connection or more frequent sex and then return home and go right back to business as usual (which often means sex and intimacy go back to the bottom of a long to-do list). Lasting relationship transformation requires that you learn and experience something new on your couple’s retreat so that sensuality and seduction become part of your everyday life!

We can help! Whether you are looking to create more intimacy and intensity in your relationship, experience new and expanded sensual and sexual experiences, learn more loving forms of communication or change relationship patterns to make way for stronger connections, a Passionate Vacation or Staycation will create lasting transformation your sex life and your relationship and you can have tons of fun on the journey. Over the course of a week or weekend – a minimum of 3 days is preferable – one of us will spend ten hours with you and your partner – we will start by talking about who you are and about your desires together and then we will embark on a special, experiential couple’s vacation created just for the two of you. You can come stay in the beautiful and romantic city of San Francisco with its stunning architecture, booming night life and tantalizing world cuisine, or invite one of us to join you in some other part of the country or the world.

Finally, if you want to stay in and create something on your own, you can bring the feeling of a vacation at home and create a “stay”cation. Here are some ideas to try, and we hope you’ll put your own unique twist on them based on what you and your partner love to do.

  • Spa Vacation – Draw a bubble bath and set a glass of some exotic fruit drink with a lemon on the rim beside it. Lay towels down on one side of the bed (if you don’t have a massage table) and get some lavender massage oil. Take turns giving each other sensual massage.
  • Camping Trip – If you have a backyard, pitch a tent in it, just make sure you have a nice, thick foam mattress to put on ground if you want anything really hot to happen. Or make a good, old-fashioned fort in your living room and have a sexy movie night.
  • Paris, Goa or Puerto Vallarta – Get take-out from one of your favorite foreign restaurants and set the table and the mood accordingly with local music (try Pandora), some slow, sexy dancing. Feed each other while you whisper sexy words to your partner (je t’aime, hum tumhe pyar karte hae, te quiero). For a complete list of how to say I love you in different languages, click here.

So tell us, how do you take the time to create sex retreats and intimate vacations for yourself throughout the year? What was your sexiest vacation or staycation? Let us know in the comments below. You never know, you might just inspire someone to have the hottest sex ever!!

You might not believe it, but humans make mistakes all the time – you, your partner, your best friend, your parents, Celeste and Danielle… everyone. The first step in gaining more confidence is admitting to yourself that you are not perfect, and then letting your partner in on that little known secret. When you allow for your imperfections to show, you make room for your partner’s imperfections as well, and then we can all be relieved to know that none of us has it “all together” – then we can really be ourselves in a good healthy relationship.

How to be more confident in relationships is not about knowing for certain that you are going to do everything perfect (p.s. you aren’t), it comes from knowing that the love, connection or caring between you and another person is strong enough to make room for your imperfections, the moments of disconnection, mistakes and all your other foibles. When you are truly confident, what you know is that you are available and can stay present through those moments of misunderstanding, disconnection and imperfection and that you can trust your partner (and others) to do their best in the situation as well. It is less about apologizing and forgiving than it is about really hearing and understanding what each person in the relationship is feeling and staying with that feeling until they are all out, heard and held. This creates reparation and reunion and allows your personal confidence and your confidence in a relationship to build in a healthy way. We invite you to take the time and energy to build this confidence by being real, sharing your underlying feelings and learning ways you and your partner can stop blaming and shaming and instead become a team focused on reparation and re-connection.

You are in a relationship. You are both intelligent people who love and care for one another. You want your relationship to be great and yet, for reasons you cannot figure out, you end up in the same conversation or with the same fights over and over again. We call this The Relationship Vortex – it is the place where your deepest hurts touch your partners deepest hurts and their deepest hurts touch yours.

When both partners have their wounds lit up at the same time, both are in what we call the “trauma zone,” where you begin to go into habitual, protective behaviors that are familiar and seem safe but are hurting your connection and intimacy with one another. Here’s an example: Caroline has a deep wound around abandonment while Joseph was highly criticized as a child. Every time Caroline tries to talk with Joseph about her needs in the relationship, he feels criticized and shuts down. As soon as she sees him shutting down, she begins to feel that old familiar abandonment feeling and starts to panic, coming after Joseph even more. He finally gets so frustrated, he storms out, leaving her feeling even more hurt and alone. After a few days of distance, they tentatively reunite, but none of the deeper hurts is ever addressed and no one learns anything about what the other person actually needs in order to stay present.

When you learn to stay present, uncover the deeper wounds and the ways you are stepping on them, it is possible to have a connected, loving and productive conversation, even about the most difficult topics. Through these kinds of conversations and the experiential practices that go with them, some kind of resolution can happen so that new patterns and habits, based on trust and mutual understanding can build. After all, the most successful relationships are not those that avoid conflict, but those that know how to come back together quickly and continue to work as a team once conflict has begun. Working as a team once conflict has begun might sound impossible, but we teach couples to do this all the time creating so much more harmony in the relationship, which makes more time for the fun things in life – intimacy, fun, playfulness, sex and love!

As brand ambassador for Good Vibes, I recently had the pleasure of reviewing the Truth or Dare game, a simple yet intriguing card game for couples to add some extra passion in the bedroom – or living room.  The game is simple and you can start playing immediately – roll a dice, pick a card from the Truth or Dare decks and do what it tells you.  The “Truth” cards actually seem to be more compelling, and we slowly gravitated to reading, imagining and sharing more about ourselves from that deck.

How much fun can you have? An example “dare” card: “Unlucky for you, little student – it’s been a tough day at school – you’re about to receive a failing grade… Now is your chance to do everything you can to convince your teacher you deserve to pass.”  Truth cards sometimes ask to talk out similar scenarios, like describing a plot to your ideal porn movie starring you and your partner.  This sometimes leads to redundancy between decks – but who’s really complaining?  The immediate benefit is discovery – even those in long relationships will discover something new about their partners, which alone is a great reason to get the game.  New couples or friends can even play just with the “truth” deck – we encourage everyone to have this experience!

Pluses:

  • Gets you talking: Undiscovered desires and unexplored territory will be covered in a lot of the questions which can lead to pleasant surprises for new and old relationships alike.
  • Fun, creative questions – some of the questions even surprised us – which is not easy to do!
  • Multi Demographical – aside form the heterosexual imagery of the art on the face of the cards, couples of all sexual orientations can play without a hiccup or re-wording anything.

Minuses:

  • Redundancy: There’s lots of redundancy in the questions and dares – you’ll want to be able to pass if you feel like you answered a question or performed a very similar act prior.
  • Some Silly Cards: A few of the Truths or Dares are either a little too childish, vague or silly.  Again, you can simply mutually agree to “pass”

Overall:

  • A fun, simple creative game that will get couples talking (and hopefully much more!) that deserves consideration for a great gift or for a surprise activity on a rainy day.

Ok, we know, we are skipping ahead, but we’ll get back to integrity and openness soon! Right now, all we can think about it something meaty to bite into. Hmmmmmm, maybe we’re ovulating! When we say that a love sandwich needs something meaty to bite into we mean this both concretely and metaphorically. To stay romantic and passionate, love requires a sexual connection full of flesh and fantasy, seduction and sensuality, teasing and temptation! If not all the time, at least regularly, we want to feel like our partner wants to eat us alive, ravish every part of us, or tantalize us into a state of orgasmic bliss. Metaphorically, love also requires that we  be there fully with each other with both our bodies and our minds. It means not only being present, but being fully willing to share our desires even if they are different from our partners. We have to feel our partner’s meatiness, to push up against one another, and to be willing to engage in conflict, which is always a part of being close and a pathway to deeper intimacy. So feel your meatiness right now, feel yourself as made of flesh and blood and desire and imagine savoring a big, delicious bite of love.