Many people rightfully complain that Valentine’s day is a “Hallmark” holiday, a creation by flower and candy pushers to make some extra money by selling cheap heart-shaped boxes and overly expensive red bouquets. We believe that Valentine’s day is simply one more day where you can remember to fully connect with all that is in your heart and share it. We also believe, if you get connected with your heart, the day can be so much more.
Reclaim the Heart of Romance
Romance is a funny thing. If we digress and get technical about it, it is simply a set of co-created behaviors that build and cement emotional connection. If we get slightly less technical, it is the verbal and physical expression of your deepest felt emotions and vulnerabilities.
Being in a state of romantic love is a bit crazy-making, an emotional roller-coaster full of unknowns and surprises where you move in and out of merging with another person and get a deeper look at who you are in the process.
Romantic movies capitalize on the delciousness of this feeling by focusing only on the beginning of this process and leaving out all of the rest that comes with opening to someone and letting them in to that level of vulnerability. As people fall more deeply and fully into love, all sorts of things begin to show up – insecurities, attachments, and all of the differences that exist between any two people. As the world rushes in, couple’s often question if romance can last a lifetime. We say yes – if you recognize it, cultivate it and deepen it when it shows up and, if you don’t expect it to be there all the time.
Love is a feeling, and like any feeling we have, we can claim it for ourselves, fully let it in, fully express it, and feel it spread through our whole bodies. This is true romance – flowers can be a symbol of it, but so can saying, “I tried to buy you flowers today and they didn’t have any that even remotely expressed all the feelings I’m having for you right now, or how beautiful you are to me.”
When we get to hear a sentence like that from that special someone while they are looking into our eyes, or touching our face, or smiling with their most fabulous smile, and we take a deep breath and let all of that feeling shoot and spread and move through us and send it back to them with our eyes, that is romance and those kinds of moments can be scattered through a lifetime with someone if we take the time to create them and feel them. This Valentine’s Day, leave the chocolate and the cards at the doorstep and try really letting yourself feel someone you love and love them back.